Queering the Triathlete (and Other Discomforts)

A Melancholy Zebra determined to strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.


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A Borderline’s “FP”

FP = “Favorite Person”

I recently learned about this term when I started browsing Tumblr again (“The horror! The horror!”) While tumbling through the various tags looking for some camaraderie, I kept seeing this acronym. Fp. Fp. Fp. What the shit is an Fp? Fart pancake? Flabby pancreas? Flirty parakeet?

And then: Ooooh!! Favorite Person. I have one of those. … I have a ton of those…  Continue reading


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The White Crayon is Boring: Justifying My Qualifications

No, really. What good is the white crayon? Generally speaking, the sheet of drawing paper is white, so if the artist needs something to be white, they use the negative space. Actually drawing with it ends up pointless. You want someone to see your drawing? Pick up a bright crayon. Use the blue. Use the red. Use the purple. Hell, use the tan. Just don’t bother with the white one.

So, perhaps you can imagine my exasperation when presented with this prompt: “In an essay, discuss… Please include any experiences, challenges, or opportunities…; how you might contribute to social or cultural diversity…; and/or how you might serve educationally underrepresented segments of society with your degree.”

… I am a skinny white girl with blue eyes and multiple liberal arts degrees. COME ON NOW.

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But I Can Fix It

Forgiveness means giving up all hope of a better past. -Jack Kornfield

But surely… surely if I dwell on it enough, replay it in my head enough, examine every little detail enough, I’ll figure out that it actually didn’t go that way! C’mon, Jack! What’s wrong with you? *pause* All right. That’s how one creates a delusion, however minor. That’s how “You hurt my feelings” turns into “You’re the BIGGEST BITCH in the ENTIRE WORLD!” and “We’ll call you” turns into “We think you’re so fucking awesome and will give you a bell at 9:00 AM tomorrow morning as the second ticks.”

But surely… surely if I just do things right this time, how things are now will look exactly like how things were then, and it’s like the past never existed! Magic Eraser! I can fix this! It can go back to normal!

… No? That’s not how it works?

Fuck.

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